mixed bag

you know how there's that one question mark dum-dum?
and, you open that junk and sometimes it's like, cherry (good)- and sometimes it's root beer (mediocre)... and sometimes it's something wouldn't have guessed like cream soda (surprisingly okay).

i feel like this year has been a real mixed bag already. i almost don't want to pin it on the year, because i feel like it's too much to label it already. i want this year to be really awesome. last year, i made a lot of professional leaps, and i'd like to keep doing that. however, the past ten days has also been full of a tough breakup, a difficult decision to take a mini-break from csz, a strange, painful injury, and most notably, a death in my extended family.

how do you keep hope when there's already so much bad?
my friends rance and deanna said it was just a walk through the valley... and right now, i feel hopeful enough to continue to believe that must be so.

otherwise, what's the point?
getting cream soda when you were worried about root beer is all i'm hoping for right now.