slow down, killer

second only to xsport, bally's at centrury mall is improv and young-person central. xsport is a nice gym, and it's underneath second city, which explains that. bally's, conversely, is 1 dollar a year, and that explains that.

if you go there and i don't know, please write me or comment, because a few of us are starting a little clubski to meet up once a week or something for a little midweek pick-me-up. workouts, when you do them 5 times a week, are pretty fucking boring. i used to hate working out with people, but now seeing pals there is nice. sometimes i get distracted with people around and that's the downside, but now it's good to be reminded that everyone is out there, doing healthy things rather than losing all their time in dens of bits or traditional offices, and has a different part of their life that you don't know about... that sort of thing.

let's talk about the weirdest thing, though. there is a guy who i have now worked out directly next to twice in the past week. bally's is big, and tons of people go there. how do i know this guy is the same guy, for sure?

HE
CHEWS
A
TOWEL
while doing an eliptical machine at 4.3 billion steps a minute!
...CHEWS A TOWEL!
LIKE, A WORKOUT TOWEL!

it is the weirdest thing i have seen in a long time. and it's aggressive, people. just aggressive chewing. this guy loves chewing! it's fully in his mouth, providing some weird ball-gag effect to eliminate pain from his speed-of-light circles.

sorry, friends, but if you chew sweat towels at the gym, you're out of the club.