Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Ladies Love Postal Workers

i went to the post office on ashland between gigs to drop off some packages, and while i was there, i realized i needed stamps as well. a man was behind the counter, a tall, handsome man who looked shockingly similar to a lighter skinned ll cool j -beautiful smile, kind eyes. his counter was open, and i stepped up. i sent my packages and asked if i could see whatever postage they had.

"sure you can," he said, and even though it was early morning, he gave me a once over. i didn't mind because it was very smooth and somehow complimentary, not slimy in the least. "here's what we have," he said, and proceeded to lay each sheet down, deliberately, on the countertop. "native american history, flowers, flags," he mechanically spoke, then said "muppets, awareness, latin dancing". as i was choosing, he secretively said, "you need a black man in your life," and my head snapped up. the pause was long, and i looked him in the eye. then he slyly laid a sheet of arthur ashe stamps down.

i laughed more honestly than i had all that long week.
also, i'm in love with him. thanks, anthony.


Anonymous trace said...

mama said knock you out.

so which stamps did you buy, also i love him too.

and did you know i am going to be a rural mail carrier this fall? i hope i get to sell stamps.

great story td.

7:45 AM  
Blogger eileen said...

That story just made my day, even i I had to live it vicariously through you.

8:04 AM  
Blogger Lindberg said...

I think it's no secret the black boys, be they light skinned or dark as midnight on a moonless night, likes the TD! I saw her being flanked by a couple handsome brothers at Smocktoberfest the other night.

I've been to a casino with her where every african american gent in the place said something, or cat called to her...I think one even stuck dollar bills in her bra, thought I may be mistaken on that.

They say once you go black, something something...

12:28 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


I say "stamps"

4:18 PM  
Blogger Rich Prouty said...

I f'ed TD and I'm black.

1:28 AM  
Anonymous trace said...

high fives to all you white sox fans... i am still wearing red sox but was cheering for you.
way to go!

7:05 AM  
Blogger Zach said...

Man. I sure could go for a black man in MY life.
Rufus this is Crazy.

4:01 PM  
Anonymous Meg said...

This story gives the threat, "I'm gonna go postal on your ass," a new and titillating meaning.

4:22 PM  
Blogger tara d. said...

trace: i bought the muppet stamps, but don't let that fool you.

eileen: yeah! i like it. i'm glad this inspired someth.

lindberg: intsch. you're kind of right. junk in the trunk?

anon: i have no idea what you mean.

prouts: black-hearted!

zach: best line of TiTC. rufus, this is crazy. though, leg cramp is a close second.

meg: and how.

6:08 PM  
Blogger Zach said...

The Pun fountain:
Can you confirm delivery of a large package?
Is there anything liquid, fragile, perishable, or otherwise potentially hazardous in there?
Was his delivery on time?
Did he handle with care?
How big was his post-age?
Any chance of Blackmail?
Does he offer pickup? How 'bout delivery to your PO box?
I can't turn it off, people!

10:39 AM  
Blogger tara d. said...

yeah, punmaster!

this game could go on for weeks.

12:20 PM  

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