Monday, January 02, 2006

turnin' tricks in '06

yeah! after a couple of late evenings/mornings, the first post here in 2006 is of course a check in to say i LOVE(!) and the happiest of new years to all of you. you, most likely, are a kickass person that i couldn't love more. you heard right.

IMPT! year theme vote! which do you like betts?
what's in the mix, '06?
get your fix, 06!
turn some tricks '06
suck some d*cks, '06! (negative)
suck some d*cks in '06! (positive?)
play sweet licks, '06
there's nougat in snicks, '06

write in votes will also be accepted.


Anonymous Montecore's Revenge said...


"Inspect Hans Blix, 2006"
"Silly rabbits eat Trix, 2006"
"Google Stevie Nicks, 2006"
"Rhyming is overrated, 2006"

As an aside, could you please explain the difference between "suck some d*cks (negative)" and "suck some d*cks (positive)?" My feeble brain fails to distinguish between the two in a meaningful way.

Also, aren't those two more "resolutions" than "themes?" ;)

3:59 PM  
Blogger christine said...

The hiphop side of me wants it to be "suck some d's" (negative and forceful) but I think I like "what's in the mix" or you could modify it to be "get in the mix". All are good, except for "rhyming is overrated, 2006" because first of all, the funniest part is the rhyme and second, you might as well do it now, because you are screwed when you get to two thousand 13!

4:55 PM  
Anonymous Montecore's Revenge said...

Rhyming is fun, but not as fun as irony.

I would also like to point out:

"Chew Dentyne, twenty-thirteen."

5:04 PM  
Blogger tara d. said...

awww, best friends.

i would like to state for the record that i have no idea who montecore's revenge is. no idea. sorry, friend.

also, the diff between the two d quotes are this - one is AT 2006 (like, suck a d, 2006!) and the other is about activity within 2006 (get some b-jos in 2006).


2:12 AM  
Anonymous Montecore's Revenge said...

Oh, now I get it. (Sorry. Again, a little slow.) The first one is like, "Hey, 2006! You a-hole! Yeah, I'm talking to you, year 2006. Suck on this!" ("thix?") The second one is like "Perform fellatio in the year 2006!" (You said "get," but I think it's more like "give").

Thank you for helping to evaporate the mists of my ignorance.

Incidentally, the latter still sounds more like a resolution to me. Not one to which I would subscribe, but one I would definitely applaud in certain others. Bravo?

One final aside - For about a year after I heard about the Hot Karl show at ComedySportz, I literally didn't know "hot karl" was something sexual until someone who works there explained it to me. Then I wished he hadn't. Ugh.

8:09 AM  
Blogger Zach said...

Do I go uncredited for Suck some dicks in '06?
I'm starting a campaign. Just watch me!

10:53 AM  
Blogger tara d. said...

no way! i was hoping you'd notice so that you'd comment. suck some dicks, 06, is thompson's all the way. ALL THE WAY!

so is "get fucked", which he said to his mother in law last week. go read about it here:

10:54 AM  
Blogger Zach said...

Whew. I'd hate to have to enforce my Patent.
Actually, I've hatched a plan to make a performance piece(gay) bit out of this. Stay tuned!

12:34 PM  
Blogger tara d. said...

it'd better be gay, if it's about you suckin' dongs this year.

trusting, of course, that you meant gay the right way. of course.

12:52 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

rent from netflix in 06?

10:49 AM  
Anonymous vinnydf said...

By the way, running a little late on cathching up with your blog but wanted comment on your slogans for 2006. Wait a sec..s l o g a n ...that is one strange word, sounds like some bad porn name...Slogan (insert creative pornographic last name ie: Long/ McPenis etc..)

My slogan: Hockey and Schlitz, 2006!

10:33 AM  
Blogger tara d. said...

i'll take that soft rhyme of schlitz! we love schlitz! columbus italians miss schlitz. someone find my brother a f*cking can!

10:56 AM  

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