Thursday, March 23, 2006

people i'd punch in a dark alley, given chance, Pt.1

*Patricia Heaton (this is a constant)
*the woman walking on the left on Belmont who told me to switch sides a week ago
*racists
*someone who hands me another script to memorize
*Larry the Cable Guy

17 Comments:

Anonymous Tom said...

What would you do if you found out Patricia Heaton was a racist, and then she tried to give you a script to memorize?

Fun fact: I'm an extra in the new Larry the Cable Guy movie.

That's a lie.

1:31 AM  
Blogger tara d. said...

i'd punch you so bad if you were.

patty heats: racist: script=
TRIPPUNCH

(face, stomach, vag.)

1:41 AM  
Blogger Hixx said...

I cannot stand Patricia Heaton.

I hate those Jewel commercials.

ergh.

8:57 AM  
Blogger kb said...

amen. i'd put patricia at the top of the list but that's probably just because i have to see her more often (f'ing jewel commercials). if oprah hadn't gone all spiritual and still had on those KKK-types, i might reconsider.

double-amen to the trippunch. the vag., a must.

12:28 PM  
Anonymous trace said...

ann curry
all the fox news people
dr. laura
jake plummer

1:31 PM  
Blogger Timmy Tapeworm said...

It depends. Are they sneaking up on me? I don't know of anyone I WOULDN'T punch in a dark alley if they snuck up on me. I'd do it just out of shock.

Also, I'm a green belt. That means instant reaction and instant PUNCH!

Quit sneaking up on me in a dark alley, people!

9:15 AM  
Blogger VinnyDF said...

I would sooooooo love to smack Patricia Heats! Our hatred for her must be genetic!

V

2:04 PM  
Blogger Timmy Tapeworm said...

As is your ability to abbreviate, apparently.

5:17 PM  
Blogger VinnyDF said...

No Timmy Tapes. TaraD has just brainwashed me into one of her followers. You will be next....mark my words....you will be next.

Lates,

V

7:17 PM  
Blogger Timmy Tapeworm said...

Oh, it's too late for me, Vinny. Much too late. I've completely co-opted her personality. It's that strong.

8:26 PM  
Anonymous trace said...

what is with you mid west peeps hating patty heats so bad...what the?
are we easterners missing something?
i mean she put up with ray for all those years, cut her some slack

6:26 AM  
Blogger VinnyDF said...

Apparently were not the only ones:

http://dlisted.blogspot.com/2005/03/patricia-heaton-is-dumb-bitch.html

http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?showtopic=2828258&st=15

V

12:21 PM  
Blogger tara d. said...

you guys, she SUCKS!

high fives to hixx, my bro, and kev-dog.

PATTY HEATS IS A FUCK.

first off, way to make women look like a total zzzzzzz, that dudes are always wrong, and women are always nags. zzzz. ray! ray, stop that ray! mars venus, ray! RAY!

but, as that is mostly harmless, ULTIMATE Z to her in real life: she pulled her kids out of some school because two teachers there in california were getting a domestic partnership. guess what? if you can't stand it, heats, stay out of the kitch. you suck.

2006, y'all!

1:41 AM  
Anonymous Tom said...

I have no problem with her, per se, but her character on that popular show she was on was annoying. She was so mean to her husband. The worst was when he lost his wedding ring, and he turned down that girl who was hitting on him in the airport - and, somehow, she got MAD about that.

Also, they did a whole episode about how much of a beeotch she was when she was on the rag - Oh, I'm sorry, that was EVERY episode.

1:12 PM  
Anonymous trace said...

just for the record i am not a heats lover...just wondering what all the buzz was about...
is that true about her kids teach?...that is sick since she is the honorary chair of feminists for life... oh shit, i just got it. for LIFE not FOR LIFE...holy f.

is it too late for me to punch her too?
twice.
i'm going double vag though, my own flare.

3:45 PM  
Blogger christine said...

Why would someone antigay (heats) star on the most anti-hetero show (raymond) I mean none of those relationships are happy. I think it is so popular becasue it mimics real life...makes me glad I am with a woman who makes me laugh and doesn't drive me crazy daily

anyway, the punch list:
*greta van susternan
*Uncle Ben - yes the rice
*Sharon Alloway - see above
*Bush- bitch slap then right left combo (closed fist) - can I say that without getting screened and monitored? - indication: everything

7:10 PM  
Blogger tara d. said...

that's interesting to think of ELRaymond as anti-het. you're right. couples are nice!

chrissy, i would love to have 8 pictures of you punching a box of Uncle Ben's rice in the face.

2:35 PM  

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